Afraid to be Special

by Rabbi Mordechai Rhine

One of the core values that Yakov aimed to instill in the Jewish family is that each person is special and had a mission. The Shevatim/ Tribes that his children founded each stood unique with a particular attribute, and it was through their respective flags and personal awareness of being special that they thrived and learned to respect others as well. As the Torah teaches, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” By having a good self awareness that G-d created you as special, you will be able to view others in the same way. Each person is entitled to respect because they, too, are special.

In the generations following Yakov the Jewish people developed the concept of being special in a very heightened way. We were given the Torah- the guide for living an uplifting and moral life. We were given the Mishkan (Sanctuary) in the desert, and later the Beis Hamikdash (Temple) as a place of unique closeness with G-d. And we were granted the Land of Israel as a place to develop that special relationship. It was hoped that the benevolence and moral clarity that the Jewish people would strive to personify would serve as a light onto the nations. The goal was not that the nations of the world should become Jewish. The goal was that a basic code of morality would be shared: no murder; no theft; no immoral relations, etc. Accepting this responsibility for all generations made the Jewish special.

But in the time of the Syrian-Greeks it became forbidden to be special. The Yevanim wanted that everyone should subscribe to the new code of pluralism and nationalistic fervor. They outlawed Torah, banned Milah, and tried to do away with the Jewish calendar and its holidays. Responding to the treasured and exclusive bond of matrimony between a Jewish husband and wife (apparently a unique loyalty that was not practiced in all cultures) the Yevanim legislated that before the wedding a Jewish girl would be required to fool around with a governor, so that the Jews would no longer be special.

Into this challenging time stepped the Chashmonoim, or Maccabees as they are fondly called. They challenged the Syrian-Greeks premise that we dare not be special. They met the Yevanim in battle, and eventually were granted a miraculous victory against this mighty Greek empire. When they came back to rededicate the desecrated Beis Hamikdash (Temple) they undoubtedly realized that they were doing much more than simply rededicating a sacred shrine. They knew that they were rededicating their awareness of being special. Instead of being forced to be “like all the other nations,” they were aware of their responsibility to Torah. As they lit the menorah they reaffirmed their role to once again be a beacon of light and of morality to all the nations.

Interestingly, when they legislated a commemoration for the event of the menorah, they did not legislate that each community should light one communal menorah to represent the menorah of the Beis Hamikdash. Remarkably they legislated that each home must light its own menorah. Because the message of victory over the Syrian-Greeks is a very personal message that must be observed by each family. It is the message that you are special. Not just the community, but each individual, has a mission and a role to illuminate the world with Torah and mitzvos. The message of the menorah is that it is okay to be special.

I recall one of the first home-study classes that I gave when I was living in New Jersey. About midway in the class I quoted something from the Talmud. Most of group, although not familiar with the term, remained attentive. But one woman pounced at the term and declared, “I don’t believe in Talmud.” I asked her why she felt that way. She said, “Because Talmud makes us different; Talmud makes us special.”

I have heard of many people who did not “like” Talmud. I know people who find the thinking process complex and difficult to follow. I know people who are challenged by the language barrier. I know people who have heard things quoted out of context and are therefore wary of its contents. But it is very sad to hear of a Jew who doesn’t like the Talmud because she feels guilty about the way it makes her feel special.

The holiday of Chanukah gives us permission to be special. It is a response to the Syrian-Greek mentality that all must pay tribute to the new world order. Instead the Jew says, “We have a special treasure gifted to us from our Father. Through it life has value. Human beings respect themselves and respect others as well.” Chanuakah tells us that it is okay to be special.

So as you gather with your family and friends during this festive season, remember the goals that have been set for us so many years ago. Discover your own specialness, your mission, your gifts, and with love and affection, help others discover their own specialness. When you give a gift, write a note that helps your loved one in self discovery. Because “It is okay to be special,” is probably the most precious gift of Chanukah.

© 2014 by TEACH613™