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Do your friends know YOU?
As the moment of redemption neared, the Jews were told to ask their Egyptian taskmasters for a parting gift. "Let them ask, each man from his friend, for vessels of silver and gold." These gifts were granted by the Egyptians, and would do much to boost the morale of the Jewish people as they left their slavery behind and proceeded to become a great and noble nation.
But the wording which the Torah uses is troubling. Could the Egyptian taskmasters be viewed as friends? How could the Torah refer to these evil slave-drivers and abusers as the "friends" and buddies, of the Jewish people?
Rav Sorotzkin explains that indeed there are two types of friends. One type of friend is the friend with whom you build a relationship, a person who respects the nobility that is within you. Throughout history there have been people who recognized our values of kindness and nobility, and they have reached out periodically with a friendship that we respect.
But there is a second type of friendship, where one does not respect what we stand for, but only what they stand for. For example, the Egyptian slave-drivers who believed that "might makes right", didn't all suddenly do Teshuva and recognize the greatness of monotheism. Rather they valued power, and they saw that Moshe was most powerful. He was able to bring one plague after another upon the enemies of his people. They respected him because they saw in him the power to destroy, which is something they respected.
Similarly, we find that Esav respects Yakov to a degree, because he sees the enormous wealth that Yakov has amassed. Also, in the time of the Purim story, many non-Jews wished to convert to Judaism when they saw the great power that was given to Mordechai when he became Prime Minister. These friendships, while they may be great politically, leave us empty, because these "friends" do not understand what we are really about.
In modern times, the State of Israel has become synonymous with many successes. Many of the modern enemies of the Jews have come to grudgingly respect the Jewish State because of its military success. While we are grateful for the political friendships resulting from military prowess, we recognize that such friendships do not express the essence of what we are all about.
There is, however, another area of expertise which has been thrust upon the Jewish State due to circumstances. As a result of constant terror attacks on civilian populations, an entire area of expertise has developed in the field of search and rescue. When disaster strikes anywhere in the world, the Jewish State is quick to lend a hand with disproportionate dedication, providing its talent in rescue with generosity and compassion. For this too, the Jewish State is noted, and earns friends. But these friendships are closer to truth because they are focused on the kindness that we value and wish to share with others.
In this week's Torah portion we read about Teffilin, leather boxes which contain special verses, including the reminder that we were once a downtrodden people who desperately needed help. The Torah demands that we remember our time of need, so that we may be ready and passionate to help others. This perspective was well articulated by Rabbi Chaim Volozion, the father of the modern Yeshiva movement: Man was not created for himself, but rather to bestow goodness on others.
If the nationally proposed sensitivity training ever materializes they can consider including a few words about Teffilin, the Exodus, and the Jewish passion to remember troubled times of the past. Perhaps, if people better understand Teffilin, they will better understand the passion that Jews have to help others in their time of need.
On a personal level you may wish to consider the relationships that you have with a variety of your own friends. Do they see in you something that they value, or do they appreciate in you something that you value?
In a fearsome world of "might makes right" one must succeed militarily, because that speaks the language of the people. But the ultimate legacy by which our truest friends will remember us is that we strive to emulate the Creator: To bestow kindness on all of creation.
With best wishes for a wonderful Shabbos,
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5770 Parsha 
